Her last day on Earth

Dee hugged her girlfriend goodbye and watched her leave through the window…like she does every morning.  As she said “Goodbye” Dee held on a bit tighter this time.  Ohh, Patti said, where did that come from?  Dee replied “I just want you to know how much I love you and you mean the world to me”.  Awww… I know you do said Patti, I really do.  She walked off and into her car she went.  Dee stood by the window the whole time waiving as Patti made her way down the pavement.

She waited……. she waited for that one phone call, that one text…. that one person that would make her change her mind……..about leaving this Earth.  It didn’t happen and she was quite surprised how she pulled it off that no one knew.  No hints, no clues.. it was never spoken about.  Only inside her head constantly.  Well, that was it.  She didn’t need anyone to change her mind.  The Financial Burden would finally end.  Such a Peaceful thought.  She made up her mind.

Sadness she felt for the loved ones she left behind.  Just hearing them say, how could she do this, why didn’t she ask for help.  If they can hear me now, I’d say… I was tired of the struggle.  I got myself into this mess, I got myself out.  I love you all very much.  Life was not fun anymore.  Please accept my sincere words of: I didn’t want to hurt anyone.

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Diaries of an Awakening Soul..Part 1

UHHHHH……………AS THE DARK LAYERS SHED, IT’S AGONY IN THIS SHELL MOST DAYS………….SHE WEEPS ON THE INSIDE SO NO ONE HEARS HER…..SOMETIMES IT’S EASIER THAT WAY…………….SHE’S AFRAID THEY WON’T UNDERSTAND………….ALONE AGAIN………WILL THIS EVER END…………..SHE REASONS WITH HERSELF THAT IT’S THE RIGHT THING TO DO IN ORDER TO GROW……AT TIMES WANTING TO PRETEND SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT SHE KNOWS…………TRUTHS ARE BEING REVEALED…..REVEALING HER OWN DARKNESS AND SHADOWS TO LET SOME LIGHT IN……..NOW KNOWING SHE CAN NEVER TURN BACK…………SHE SITS WITH THIS………..ALONE AGAIN……………

He took that sip…

I couldn’t believe my ears.  After all the progress he made…. reunited and got full custody of his 8 year old son, nice job and a nice place to live………..He took that sip of Alcohol.  All these thoughts rushed into my head, but the one that stuck out the most was, I wonder what drove him there.  What was it that made him go back into that darkness.  Let me feel it, experience it.. let me relate to it just for a moment.  I want to know what you feel right before you decide to take that drink.  What is that darkness like???  Why is it that all those positive things in his life couldn’t over power the Demon.  I pray for you today, for Strength, Will, and the Determination to move forward and start again.  I pray you dust yourself off and let yesterday be done, Today I can.